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Chucky has struggled mightily this winter with a couple of things, including the weather and his nagging inability to correctly pick winners in high school basketball games. Also, he got into a peck of trouble for gnawing on power lines for warmth.

CLASS-A District at Richland Gull Lake

Jackson (12-8) v. Grand Ledge (17-2):   These two have met twice this year and neither has been close, with GL winning by 19 and 20 points. In an effort to change their fortunes, the Vikings visit a spiritual healer before the game to cleanse themselves of bad thoughts. Sadly, the healer is a Grand Ledge graduate wearing a Comets jersey and this merely causes issues. PICK: GRAND LEDGE


CLASS-B District at Olivet

Charlotte (14-5) v. Western (3-16): In this first round matchup the Panthers race onto the court before the game showing off their plaque for winning the Area’s Best Student Section Award. The jubilation doesn’t carry over into the game, however, and they are quickly whisked out of the tournament. PICK: CHARLOTTE

ROUND TWO- Charlotte (15-5) v. Northwest (17-2): In the second round, the Mounties receive a personal note from the Western girls that reads, in part, ‘dear Mounties, please smash Charlotte for us.’ The Northwest girls, buoyed by this show of Jackson area pride, accept the good wishes and handle their business. PICK: NORTHWEST

Chucky knows everyone in the area is looking for a Northwest/Eaton Rapids matchup in the district final, as those two have developed a fabulous rivalry over the last few years. Sadly, someone forgot to tell Olivet, who went 17-0 in the Kalamazoo Valley Association. Say that slowly with me, ‘Olivet went 17 and 0 in the KVA.’ Yikes.

DISCTRICT CHAMPIONSHIP GAME: Olivet (21-1) v. Northwest (18-2): Chucky can’t hide his love and excitement for the Mounties, and he’s on-scene pulling wildly for them while filling his big belly with salted soft pretzels. Olivet, however, plays like a team of angry hornets and no one likes angry hornets. Also, angry Eagles aren’t as scary. PICK: OLIVET

CLASS-C District at Lumen Christi

Lumen Christi (10-10) v. Napoleon (15-4): The Pirates, angry after losing out on a league title to East Jackson, break into Napoleon Bee Supply and turn all the bees loose in an effort to terrorize the area. The bees, however, are quite sluggish in the cold and merely clump together and do nothing. PICK: NAPOLEON

ROUND TWO – Napoleon (16-4) v. Columbia Central (13-7): Rather than play a basketball game, as mandated by the state, these two old rivals meet in the parking lot of the Wesco Bakery in Brooklyn and throw fresh, cinnamon donuts at each other. It’s later revealed that fresh, cinnamon donuts hurt when they hit you in the face. PICK: NAPOLEON

DISTRICT CHAMPIONSHIP: Chelsea (17-5) v. Napoleon (17-4): The Pirates are feeling pretty good about themselves by now, setting up a great title game with the plucky Bulldogs. Napoleon’s girls team took an oath before the season never to lose to a team described as ‘plucky.’ PICK: NAPOLEON

CLASS-C District at East Jackson

Homer (9-10) v. Vandercook Lake (3-16): It’s been a tough year for the Jayhawks in the rugged Cascades Conference, but there’s good news afoot! The new Klavons will be opening soon. PICK: HOMER

ROUND TWO – Homer (10-10) v. Concord (14-6): The Lady Jackets fill two large vats with rice pudding and haul it with them to EJ for a taste of home. Things get ugly when they forget and try to dump it on their coach after this round two win. PICK: CONCORD

Hanover-Horton (3-17) v. Michigan Center (16-4): Rudy’s Drive-In is open for the season in Center and the Cardinals are promised root beer floats if they win this game. The Comets try to switch things up by eating the floats before the game, but this only makes them sluggish. PICK: MC

ROUND TWO- Michigan Center (17-4) v. East Jackson (16-4): Which way to go with this one? The Trojans blasted MC last week to win the conference but paybacks are… well, sometimes not always fun. It’s the magic carpet ride of EJ’s fabulous season vs. the battle-tested tradition of the angry Cardinals. Chucky considers it a toss-up, but sides with revenge. PICK: CENTER

DISTRICT CHAMPIONSHIP: Michigan Center (18-4) v. Concord (15-6): It’s rice pudding vs. root beer floats, walking tacos vs. Rudy’s hamburgers, Yellow Jackets vs. Cardinals and this year vs. last year. In an ode to tournament toughness, Chucky’s going red. PICK: MICHIGAN CENTER

CLASS-C District at Clinton

Manchester (15-5) v. Grass Lake (10-10): It’s been a strangely quiet year for the Dutch after last year’s championship run, but they’re still very good. The Warriors, looking forward to upcoming spring break trips, arrive on-scene wearing Hawaiian shirts rather than jerseys. This is never a good idea. PICK: MANCHESTER

The other three teams in the district (Whitmore Lake, Clinton & Ann Arbor Greenhills) combine to form some type of mega-team. It fails.


CLASS-D District at Tekonsha

Jackson Christian v. Tekonsha: Chucky spent some time in Tekonsha when he was younger. Wait, no he didn’t. Hang on a sec, just what IS Tekonsha? PICK: JACKSON CHRISTIAN

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